It’s the dawn of a new month, the start of meterological summer, and it’s going to be 90 degrees and humid for the next three months in Minnesota. Why don’t we stay inside and round up the evening in Minnesota sports?

We start with Minnesota United FC, which dropped a hair-tearing 2-1 decision in Austin. Joseph Rosales scored the team’s lone goal, but Minnesota could have scored about five; Rosales had a first-half goal ruled out for offside, as did Hassani Dotson as the Loons searched for a late equalizer.

That search for the late equalizer was particularly garment-rending; Dotson’s goal was disallowed, Bongokuhle Hlongwane should have scored, Sang Bin Jeong and DJ Taylor tested Austin keeper Brad Stuver, but nothing came of it.

Of course, this came after Rosales had gone off with an apparent groin strain with 20 minutes to go, leading Adrian Heath to shift his team into a 4-5-1 to try to see the game out. This is a 4-5-1 that’s working about as well as a Vikings prevent defense these days; Austin scored ten minutes later from, of all things, a long throw to the penalty spot that nobody could clear.

Every high school soccer team in the nation has a play where they launch a long throw at the penalty spot, and hope that everyone misses a header and the ball bounces around a little bit and maybe finds a player. In this case, that player was Sebastian Driussi. Not good!

The Loons don’t really have enough points in the bank, or enough points likely to come their way in the future, that they can afford to be dropping one or three. The MLS website had MNUFC winning the xG battle 3.1 to 1.3, so it’s fair to look at this one as three points swirling down the drain.

In other news, Luis Amarilla didn’t even make the bench for this one, and my old, trusted MN soccer friend Brian Quarstad says that he’s hearing that Teemu Pukki to MNUFC is a done deal, so apparently we’re about to be on to a new era of number 9s in Minnesota, for approximately the sixth time in five years. (Amarilla’s apparently off to Mazatlan in Liga MX.)

The more I think about it, the more I support this. Not only did several Norwich City fans tell me on Twitter that Pukki’s drop-off last season was merely due to the craptitude of the entire Canaries attack, but ultimately, the Loons needed to do something up front. Whether this works or not, at least it’s something, and not just “let’s sign the eleventh-leading scorer from a second-rate South or Central American league and see if we unearth a diamond.”

Also deepinthehearta Texas, the Twins finally won a series! On the road, against - of all teams - the Astros! Minnesota hadn’t won a series since pounding the hapless Cubs into the dirt in mid-May, and they did it in surprising fashion in this one. Louie Varland spun a gem, allowing four hits and a walk in seven scoreless innings, and - qué milagro! - the Twins actually got not one, but TWO hits with the bases loaded. Donovan Solano had the first, a single that scored two in the third inning, and Ryan Jeffers had the second, a ground-rule double in the fifth inning that maybe relegated Christian Vázquez to second-catcher duty for awhile.

Solano drove in four, Willi Castro scored three runs, Michael A. Taylor was on base three times and scored twice and drove in a run with a double - it truly was a victory for the “guys that the Twins signed because their best players were not-so-secretly hurt” brigade.

Also, a word for Jorge López, who might be out on the street at this point if the Twins weren’t entirely desperate for relief pitching, and who - despite becoming completely unpitchable - is probably still second on the “drop this guy” list behind Emilio Pagan. Lopez went all of March and April without giving up a run; in May, his ERA is a deserved 9.00. Wednesday, he came in the eighth with the Twins leading 8-0, gave up two home runs on three pitches, walked a guy, hit a guy, and then was presumably tackled off the mound by Pete Maki before he got them both fired.

He also can’t tell the difference between Gatorade and water and took it out on a cooler. Not helpful, Jorge!

I predicted a bloodbath in the Minnesota Aurora’s scheduled game against hapless RKC Third Coast, but it ended up worse than I thought; the Aurora won 10-0 and Maya Hansen had a hat-trick in the first half.

I would submit to whoever’s running the USL W League that maybe letting just anybody field a team in the league is not a great idea.

Down in Triple-A, the Saints won again in a Wednesday matinee, beating up on Buffalo 6-2. Jose Miranda and Matt Wallner both hit home runs and had three hits; Miranda’s 5 for 9 in Buffalo after batting .155 in his first two and a half weeks with the Saints. Wallner, fresh off a four-game stint with the Twins in which he was 7 for 11 with a homer, has continued tearing it up in St. Paul, homering in both games and going 3 for 5 on consecutive days.

Would it be churlish to note that Max Kepler is 1 for 14 since replacing Wallner with the Twins?

Oh, Kyle Garlick mashed a homer for the Saints, too.

Thursday, the Twins return as conquering heroes to Target Field, taking on Cleveland in the first of four. I’m sure Twins fans have no bad memories at all of the Twins playing Cleveland at home in early summer with a 3.5 game lead on the Guardians.

The Lynx are also back home, taking on the East-leading Connecticut Sun, which should be a tall order. The Saints are still in Buffalo, and play the Bison at 10:05am, which is not a typo; it’s “School Kids Day” in Buffalo, which I’m sure will be deafening chaos. My thoughts and prayers to everyone who’s chaperoning kids in Buffalo.